I wanted to write her a note for several weeks, but day after day, I put it off out of fear. She might say no. She’s probably too busy. Maybe she just won’t want to do it.

In the core of my being, I knew my hesitation was rooted in the fear of rejection. With the help of the Holy Spirit, I confronted my fear head-on, and before I had the chance to talk myself out of it again, I grabbed a pen and a notecard. I began to handwrite a letter, and after re-reading it numerous times, I sealed the envelope and stuck it in my Bible. I would give it to her that evening at Bible study.

I knew this was the right thing to do, and throughout the day, I continued to remind myself to trust in the Lord, whatever the outcome. Asking an older, godly woman to mentor me was exactly what my twenty-seven-year-old self needed. After all, I was very familiar with Titus 2 and the framework it provides for spiritual parenting through intergenerational mentoring, with a focus on older believers (men and women) investing in younger ones, sharing wisdom, and guiding them in faith.

The next week, after our women’s Bible study had finished, the woman whom I had given the note to the week before invited me to sit down at the table beside her. She told me she would love to mentor me! I tried to contain my excitement so I wouldn’t come across too desperate, but that didn’t work so well. I immediately hugged her (I might have even clapped my hands) and told her how happy I was that she said yes! I couldn’t wait to start learning from this powerful and anointed woman of God.

Friends, mentorship and discipleship are foundational for our spiritual growth and personal accountability. Mentorship acts as a “tether” that provides the perspective, stability, and nourishment we often lack when navigating life alone. Think of an older, sturdy tree supporting a sapling. Mentors offer the strength they have gained from weathering their own storms. They provide outside perspectives that help you see past “tunnel vision” and immediate crises. Godly wisdom from those who are a few steps ahead of you on their own faith journey, someone who has walked the path a little longer and is willing to share their wisdom and experience, is priceless.

I will never forget the first meeting I had with my mentor. Her name was Carol. It was a warm, sunny Spring afternoon, and she suggested we meet at a local park. I was running a few minutes behind, which caused me to be slightly flustered. By the time I got the girls and the stroller out of the car and reached where she was on the park bench, it was as if I had rushed in like a whirlwind with our toddler and six-month-old baby in tow. Carol giggled. She grabbed the hand of our oldest daughter, turned to look at me, and said, “You just sit down and catch your breath while we go swing.”

We spent about two hours together that afternoon discussing life, Jesus, challenges, prayers, and accountability—you name it, we talked about it. Titus 2 was coming to life right before my very eyes. The years the Lord allowed me to have with Carol were transforming in every sense of the word. She taught me simple things like marking up my Bible and how to memorize Scripture, to transformative things like anointing oil, dedicated prayer spaces, and travailing prayer for hours on end. Carol taught me how to pray and listen for God’s voice. I contend, I would not be who I am today without her willingness to invest in me, a young woman who so deeply admired the anointing and call upon her life, but was scared to ask for help.

Now, more than ever, I want this for every man and woman (regardless of your age or station in life). Asking someone to mentor you isn’t as scary as it seems, I promise. And to the other end, being a mentor isn’t as scary as it seems, I promise.

I wonder, is this something you have been desiring? And this goes both ways—maybe you long to have a mentor who will invest in you, but also, maybe some of you are longing to be a mentor. If this is you, don’t let fear grip your heart. Pray for courage and then take a leap of faith. If this still sounds scary and you don’t know how to ask, I’m going to share the note I wrote to Carol in 2005. When she passed away a few years ago, one of her family members sent me a private Facebook message with a picture of the card I wrote. Here is what I said:

Dear Carol,
Thank you for being such a strong leader of our women’s Bible studies. I am learning so much. I really look up to you as a woman of God, and I want to be just like you when I “grow up” (I drew a smiley face here). I have been praying about finding a mentor, and you continue to come to mind. I am sure you have a busy schedule, but I would love to have you as my spiritual mentor. Would you please pray about this and let me know? I understand if this isn’t a good time or if it may not be something you are interested in, but I wanted to ask.

With love,
Jen Ryerson

Having a mentor is a delightful part of God’s plan for discipleship. I cannot encourage you enough to begin praying today. Ask God to provide a godly older man or older woman in your life. Or maybe you begin praying that God will bring a younger man or a younger woman into your life who you could mentor and invest in. Mentors make disciples and influence souls. Your investment will be life-changing.

To be sure, we live in a world filled with distraction and noise, and many of us find ourselves asking, “Who can I talk to?” We long for authentic relationships and guidance, a steady hand to help us navigate life’s pitfalls, and a compass to point us toward a deeper sense of purpose. This is exactly where the wonderful gift of spiritual mentoring comes in. Friends, it’s more than advice, it’s a lifeline for the soul.

If I had the opportunity to give Carol a note today, this is what I would write:

My dear mentor, a mighty warrior woman,
Thank you. Thank you for taking the time to love me right where I was while encouraging me to grow. Thank you for showing me friendship in so many ways. Thank you for pointing me back to Christ every day, but never looking down on me when I struggled to move in that direction. Most importantly, thank you for striving to be like Christ, remaining humble through it all, and loving others as Christ loves us.  Your investment and presence in my life have blessed not only me but generations to come.

Ever grateful,
Jen Ryerson

Friends, if you have a longing in your heart about mentorship, please reach out to me. I would love to talk and pray with you about what this might look like in your life.

Shine bright, beloved ~
Pastor Jen